Day 2 – How to clean your apartment
Pick up your laundry on your way home from work. Your goal today is to clean up your place. If you have your own place we are going to spend the evening making it look, and smell decent. Start with by opening every window in the place then get a large garbage bag and head through the room/s. Old pizza boxes, empty beer cans, etc. go into the bag. Go through the fridge and anything that’s green that isn’t suppose to be, toss it in there as well. Do the dishes, put them away, make the bed (I know your going to be sleeping in it tonight) but do it anyways, then in the morning as soon as you get up make it again. Once it is a habit it is really easy to do and takes less then 10 seconds. Plus every woman is impressed when she sees a single guys apartment and his bed is made.
Clean the Bathroom
The Bathroom is incredibly important here. Get yourself some all-purpose cleaner and spend some time scrubbing it. Get all that nasty shit off the sink, toilet and shower stall. Spend some extra time on the toilet, if there are brown streaks in the bowl you have to scrub them off. Women do not want proof that your bowls are working correctly. CLEAN the mirror, if you have been banging zits in front of it chances are it is bloody nasty, and your breath will tell her enough, the mirror does not need toothpaste splatter on it.
Not sure how to do this? Really easy, get a rag, one of your old t-shirts or a dish towel and wet one half – wipe the mirror and use the other half to dry it. This works with mirrors, not windows sorry. For windows you are going to need to buy a bottle of spray window cleaner and a roll of paper towels. Ok bathroom is done and anything resembling garbage has been tossed out.
Clean the Kitchen
Move to the kitchen, clean the sink, counter, floor, and get the grime off the fridge. Get EVERYTHING off the counter that shouldn’t be there. Put everything in the cupboards if you have them. Best if you organize them, but I’m not going to push it to far. First impressions as we know are very important, you will be forgiven if the place looks great on first inspection and she happens to get knocked unconscious when opening a cupboard by falling cutlery. Besides unconscious can be considered presumed consent? Just kidding.
Clean the Bedroom
Bedroom, check close here, you don’t want to leave that pair of sweat socks that have been fermenting for the past 3 weeks under the bed. Get a cloths hamper and put ALL dirty cloths in it that you didn’t wash yesterday. You should have already made the bed and I am not going to tell you to wash the sheets yet since you will probably be sleeping in it alone tonight anyways. We will save the fresh sheets for later next week. If you have two sets, I know unlikely, then get the second set washed and put them away where they will not get covered in gym cloths stink. Ie: don’t put your gym bag, hockey equipment, dirty sweat socks, or anything else that stinks within 20 feet of your fresh clean sheets.
PS – Vacuuming the sheets does not count as washing them and should only be done when time is extremely limited with no chance of washing them prior to her coming over.
Clean the Living Room
If you have a living room, it’s time to move in there. Take all cushions off the furniture, presuming you have any. Vacuum under the cushions, you might want to check her first for your favorite sweatshirt that has gone missing or chunks of pizza crust, they tend to mess up vacuum cleaners. Now vacuum the floor and the cushions for the furniture before you put them back on.
If you have a cat well, you are a single guy with a cat, I don’t know what to tell you. Actually it’s not that bad even if I am going to start questioning your sexuality. If you are a cat owner clean the litter box, nothing worse then an apartment that smells like cat piss.
Alternatively if this all sounds like too much work and you have a few hundred bucks extra, call a cleaning service and tell them you want a ‘Hard Cleaning’ this will involve, windows, vacuuming, etc. and who knows maybe you will get the maids number?